Hollywood Wankers: #MeToo

There’s a saying in show business, “it’s all about who you sleep with,” and it’s not a joke. They also say you “sell your soul,” to get ahead. It’s legitimate. With all the #MeToo stuff going around it seems like the country is shocked that a pervert would take advantage of his power to force himself upon people. Guess what… he’s not the only one… and guess what… it happens to men too.

Hollywood is rampant with sex, just ask Corey Feldman. There are people who have the power to make or break your career. Harvey Weinstein is just the tip of the iceberg. We have yet to see a fraction of the rats in the woodwork. I’m not saying all movie producers and casting agents are bad. Some are good, faithful to their spouses, and family friendly.
…some are not.

The woman at Chipotle gives me extra chicken on my burrito when I make her laugh. Now apply that same concept to an audition. I’m not saying that everyone in the industry is disgusting, far from it, but those who are have the opportunity to be in close, personal proximity to attractive young people who are willing to do just about anything to get ahead. Sometimes, it’s not the devil who buys your soul, but an evil person who steals your essence. You are on a leather couch, across from someone who can make you a star.
All you have to do is show them your bits and pieces.
Do you show them?

You don’t have to be Angelina Jolie or Ashley Judd to experience disgusting people asking for sick acts of perversion in exchange for making you a star. I’m a D-level former standup (current writer and voiceover talent), and although I’ve never had a Comedy Central special, I’ve been in a dozen TV shows and films. Heck, I’m only 2 degrees separated from Kevin Bacon.

As a young comedian with big dreams in 2008, I was hoping to advance my career by getting an agent or a manager who could send me on acting auditions. My naive 25-year-old self walked into a stuffy little office on the 4th floor of a building in lower Manhattan to find a plump, crusty old man blowing cigarette smoke out the window. After asking a few questions about my act, he pitched me on a web series he was starting called Channel 125. I didn’t have much interest, because it seemed like a half-baked outlet for online content, and all of my videos were already getting plenty of online exposure. Toward the end of our meeting, he asked if I’d be willing to sleep with a casting director to get a role.
My response was, “…it depends what she looks like.”
His response was, “…what about a he?”

Now, 10 years later, I look him up and come to find that Channel 125 has come out of the closet (not that there’s anything wrong with that). It is still a half-baked outlet for online content, but instead of hosting comedians and other artists, the focus of the site is gay pride. I hope that everyone featured on his (1990’s-style ad-covered) webpage is there willingly and with open eyes.

After a dozen years designing graphics for major-market TV networks, I can tell you this type of thing is just as prevalent on the small screen as it is on the big screen. Is it any coincidence that the young, good-looking Production Assistant who went out for drinks with the Coordinating Producer got the best assignments and a new title more quickly than their peers? It doesn’t take much digging to uncover dozens of stories of affairs and scandals at any major network.

Go ahead. Do some digging.
That’s one story you won’t see on the news.

Oh, and another thing. I’m tired of people like Quentin Tarantino saying things like, “I knew enough to do more than I did.” Dude, you know a dozen other sleasebags who are just as guilty of crimes against innocence as Weinstein. Do something now. Call them out and stop them from continuing the cycle. A year from now another big name will be singled out and once again all you’ll hear is, “I knew, and I did nothing.”


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